When Does Limerence End? 5 Signs You're Finally Moving On

Have you ever felt yourself wondering, when does limerence end? It might be that you feel trapped in an intense crush that just won’t go away? or your thoughts keep circling around one person, leaving you emotionally drained, it might be that you are experiencing limerence. But the good news is that limerence doesn’t last forever.

So, when does limerence end? And how do you know if you’re finally moving on? Let’s explore the timeline of limerence, what influences its duration, and the five key signs that your emotions are shifting.

6 minute read

 
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What is limerence?

Limerence is a powerful, involuntary feeling of infatuation with someone, often mixed with obsessive thoughts and an overwhelming desire for them to feel the same way. Unlike a typical crush, limerence can feel all-consuming and is driven by the hope that the other person will return your feelings. The emotional rollercoaster that comes with it can cause extreme highs when you get attention from them and deep lows when you don’t.

Signs of limerence:

  • You can’t stop thinking about them, even when you're trying to focus on other things.

  • You idealize them, overlooking their flaws and seeing them as perfect.

  • You feel euphoric when they give you attention but anxious or depressed when they don’t.

  • You replay every interaction with them in your mind, looking for hidden meanings.

  • You feel physically affected by them—racing heart, butterflies, or difficulty concentrating.

  • Your self-worth becomes tied to whether they reciprocate your feelings.

If these signs sound familiar, you might be experiencing limerence. It's a powerful feeling, but understanding it can help you find clarity.

 


How long does limerence last?

The duration of limerence varies for everyone, but research suggests it typically lasts between six months to three years. Several factors influence how long it lingers, including:

  • Reciprocation: If the person returns your feelings, limerence may transform into a real relationship or fade as reality sets in.

  • No contact vs. continued interaction: Seeing the person regularly can prolong limerence, while distance helps break the emotional attachment.

  • Personal healing work: Engaging in self-reflection and emotional healing can accelerate the process of moving on.



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5 biggest signs that limerence is coming to an end

Now, let’s dive into the five biggest signs that limerence is coming to an end.

1. You think about them less often

At the peak of limerence, thoughts about this person feel obsessive—looping in your mind no matter how hard you try to focus on other things. As you start to heal, you’ll notice:

  • You go hours or even days without thinking about them.

  • Their presence no longer dominates your emotional world.

  • You don’t feel the urge to check their social media constantly.

This mental space is a clear sign that limerence is losing its grip.

 

2. Their actions no longer dictate your emotions

When limerence is at its strongest, their smallest actions—like a text reply or lack of one—can send you soaring with joy or spiraling into despair. But as limerence fades:

  • Your mood is no longer controlled by their attention or lack of it.

  • You stop overanalyzing their words, texts, or social cues.

  • You feel emotionally steadier, regardless of what they do.

This emotional independence is a key sign that you're regaining control over your feelings.

 
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3. You see them more realistically

Limerence thrives on idealization, making the person seem almost perfect. But when reality starts kicking in, you’ll notice:

  • You recognize their flaws and accept they are just another human.

  • You stop putting them on a pedestal or seeing them as "the one."

  • You realize they might not be as compatible with you as you once thought.

Seeing them for who they truly are—rather than through the lens of infatuation—means your feelings are shifting.

4. You feel excited about other aspects of life

One of the biggest signs that limerence is ending is when your world expands again. Instead of hyper-focusing on one person, you:

  • Start rediscovering hobbies and passions you neglected.

  • Feel genuinely interested in other friendships and relationships.

  • Experience personal growth that isn’t tied to their approval.

As your energy returns to yourself, you gain a renewed sense of purpose and fulfillment.

5. You no longer crave their reciprocation

At the core of limerence is the longing for reciprocation—wanting them to notice, love, or validate you. When limerence fades, you’ll find:

  • You don’t need them to complete you or make you feel worthy.

  • You stop fantasizing about a future with them.

  • You feel at peace, whether they’re in your life or not.

This final shift—accepting that you can be happy regardless of their role in your life—is a powerful indicator that limerence is truly over.

 
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Life after limerence

Limerence can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t last forever. By recognizing these signs, you’ll see that you’re making progress, even if it’s slow. If you’re still struggling to let go, consider:

  • Practicing mindfulness to stay present.

  • Reducing contact or setting emotional boundaries.

  • Investing in your own personal growth and healing.

The more you focus on yourself, the faster limerence loses its hold. And when you do finally move on, you’ll realize that true love isn’t about obsession—it’s about balance, connection, and mutual respect.

Have you experienced limerence? How did you know it was ending? Share your thoughts in the comments.

 
Cara Hernon

Written By Cara Hernon BSc Medical Science

 

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Cara Hernon

BSc Medical Science

Hi, it’s Cara here.

Before founding On the Uppp, I spent my career creating content for physical health and mental health services, working on public health campaigns and acting as a policy consultant for mental health. The longer I worked in the field, the clearer it became that we needed to shift away from clinical language, and share wellbeing skills in a way people can hear us. A big shift, from mental health as a problem to something more aspirational.

Most of us want to be able to cope with the challenges of life a little better, that’s why I’ve developed On the Uppp to give users the guidance they need to begin to tackle whatever is on their mind. 

Qualifictions

2.1 BSc Medical Science - Newcastle University

W3C WCAG 3.0 Accessibility Qualified

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