8 Signs Your Relationship Has No Boundaries (And How to Set Healthy Ones)

Ever feel like your relationship is draining you instead of lifting you up? Maybe you say "yes" when you really want to say "no," or your partner expects to be involved in every little part of your life. If that sounds familiar, your relationship might need stronger boundaries.

Boundaries aren’t about pushing your partner away—they’re about making sure both of you feel respected, valued, and free to be yourselves. Let’s go over some signs that your relationship might be missing boundaries and how to fix it.

5 minute read

1. You always put your partner’s needs first

It’s normal to want to make your partner happy, but if you’re constantly ignoring your own needs, that’s a problem. Maybe you skip things you enjoy, change your plans, or feel like you have to keep your opinions to yourself to avoid conflict. Over time, this can leave you feeling exhausted and resentful.

How to fix it: Start small. Speak up about what you want and need. It’s okay to take care of yourself too! A healthy relationship means both people feel heard and valued.

2. You struggle to say no

Do you ever feel guilty turning down a request from your partner? Maybe they ask for favors, want your time 24/7, or expect you to agree with them on everything. If you feel pressured to say "yes" all the time, that’s a sign of weak boundaries.

How to fix it: Practice saying "no" in a kind but firm way. You don’t need a big explanation. A simple "I can’t do that today" is enough.

3. Your privacy isn’t respected

Your phone, journal, or personal space should be yours. If your partner reads your messages, checks your location, or constantly questions where you are, that’s a red flag. Everyone deserves some privacy, even in a close relationship.

How to fix it: Set clear expectations. Let your partner know that privacy isn’t about hiding things—it’s about trust.

4. You feel responsible for their happiness

It’s great to support your partner, but their happiness isn’t your job. If they get upset when you’re busy, or you feel like you always have to cheer them up, your relationship may lack boundaries.

How to fix it: Remind yourself (and them) that everyone is responsible for their own feelings. It’s okay to be supportive, but not at the cost of your own well-being.

5. How you feel gets dismissed

Do you ever share your feelings, only to hear something like, "You’re overreacting" or "That’s not a big deal"? In a healthy relationship, both people feel safe expressing their emotions.

How to fix it: Speak up when you feel dismissed. Try saying, "I need you to listen and understand my feelings, even if you don’t agree with them."

6: You’re always available

If you feel like you have to drop everything for your partner all the time, that’s a sign your boundaries are too loose. Constant availability can lead to burnout and resentment.

How to fix it: Make time for yourself! Set boundaries around your schedule and stick to them. It’s okay to say, "I’ll call you later" or "I need some time for myself."

7. You feel guilty for taking time for yourself

Wanting alone time or space to do your own thing doesn’t mean you don’t love your partner. If you feel guilty for needing a break, that’s a sign something’s off.

How to fix it: Remind yourself that taking time for yourself isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. Encourage your partner to do the same.

8. It feels like a power struggle

Do you and your partner constantly argue over decisions, time, or control? If one person is always pushing their way, it can make the other feel unheard and frustrated.

How to fix it: Work together instead of against each other. Instead of fighting for control, talk about what works best for both of you.

How to Set Healthy Boundaries

If you’ve noticed some of these signs in your relationship, don’t worry! Boundaries can be built at any time. Here’s how:

• Talk About It: Let your partner know what you need and listen to their needs too.

• Take Small Steps: Start with one boundary at a time and practice enforcing it.

• Stick to Your Limits: It’s okay to say no, ask for space, or take time for yourself.

• Check In Regularly: Boundaries can change as your relationship grows. Make sure they still work for both of you.

Healthy relationships have balance. Boundaries help make sure both people feel respected, loved, and free to be themselves. If your relationship needs a boundary check, now is the perfect time to start.

Written by Cara Hernon BSc Medical Science

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