11 Subtle Signs Someone Doesn’t Like You (And How to Handle It)
Ever get the feeling someone isn’t exactly your biggest fan? It’s not always obvious—most people won’t flat-out tell you they dislike you. Instead, they’ll drop subtle (or not-so-subtle) hints through their body language, tone, and behavior.
The good news? Once you recognize these signs, you can stop wasting energy on one-sided relationships and focus on the people who actually appreciate you. Here are 11 ways to tell if someone just isn’t that into you.
4 minute read
1. They Give You Short, Dismissive Responses
If someone consistently gives you one-word answers or barely engages in conversation, it might be a sign they don’t enjoy talking to you. Sure, some people are just quiet—but if they’re chatty with others and reserved only with you, that’s a clue.
2. Their Body Language is Closed Off
Body language speaks volumes. If someone avoids eye contact, turns their body away from you, crosses their arms, or physically distances themselves when you’re around, they might not be comfortable with your presence.
3. They Don’t Laugh at Your Jokes
You crack a joke, and… crickets. If someone never laughs at your humor but finds others hilarious, they might not be feeling the connection. (Or maybe your jokes need work—be honest with yourself!)
4. They Avoid Making Plans (or Always Cancel)
If someone constantly dodges invitations or “forgets” to reply to your messages about meeting up, they might be trying to create distance. Everyone’s busy, but if they make time for others and not for you, take the hint.
5. They Never Initiate Contact
Friendships and relationships should be mutual. If you’re always the one texting, calling, or starting conversations while they never reach out first, they might not be invested in the relationship.
6. They Barely Acknowledge Your Achievements
A good friend or colleague will celebrate your wins, big or small. If someone ignores your successes, brushes them off, or even seems annoyed when you share good news, they might not have the warmest feelings toward you.
7. They Seem Distracted or Impatient When You Talk
Do they check their phone, glance around the room, or seem eager to leave when you’re speaking? If someone consistently seems disinterested in what you have to say, they probably don’t value your conversations.
8. They Don’t Ask About Your Life
If someone never asks follow-up questions or shows curiosity about your life, it’s a sign they don’t really care to connect with you. People who like you will naturally want to know more about your thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
9. They Exclude You From Group Activities
Being left out once or twice might be coincidence. But if you frequently find out about plans after they happen or notice that the same group hangs out without inviting you, there might be a reason you’re being excluded.
10. They Give You Backhanded Compliments (or None at All)
If someone only offers “compliments” that feel more like insults (like “You’re surprisingly smart” or “That outfit is so… interesting”), they’re not being genuine. A lack of compliments altogether can also indicate indifference.
11. They Act Differently Around You vs. Others
Notice that they’re warm and friendly with everyone except you? If their energy drops or they become cold only when you’re around, it’s a major red flag that they’re not your biggest fan.
How to handle rejection?
Don’t take it personally – Not everyone will like you, and that’s okay. It’s not always about you; sometimes, it’s about their own issues.
At the end of the day, life’s too short to spend time on people who don’t appreciate you. Pay attention to those who reciprocate your energy, and let the rest go.
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If it’s someone important (like a coworker or family member), consider addressing it. Otherwise, it might be best to let go.
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Focus on people who genuinely value your presence.
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If someone’s behavior is toxic or disrespectful, distance yourself.
Written by Cara Hernon BSc Medical Science
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