12 Traits of a Narcissist: How to Recognize the Signs

Have you ever found yourself feeling manipulated, undervalued, or even confused by someone’s behavior? Maybe they seem charming at first, but over time, you start noticing that something feels a little off. They demand attention, can’t handle criticism, and seem completely indifferent to your feelings. If this sounds familiar, it might be a sign that you're dealing with a narcissist.

So, let’s take a look at 12 traits you might notice in a narcissist. These signs can show up in a variety of relationships—whether it’s with a partner, family member, friend, or colleague.

8 minute read

12 traits of a narcissist

While not everyone who displays narcissistic behavior has a full-blown personality disorder. But recognizing the traits can help you understand patterns in behavior that might be causing you stress or confusion. And that awareness? It’s a powerful tool for setting healthy boundaries and navigating your relationships.

Grandiose sense of self-importance

Narcissists often see themselves as larger than life. They tend to exaggerate their achievements and expect others to recognize them—whether they’ve earned it or not. It’s not that they’re necessarily lying, but they often believe their accomplishments are bigger or more impressive than they really are.

Constant need for admiration

Do you ever feel like someone is always fishing for compliments? Narcissists are known for needing constant validation and admiration. They want to feel special and will go to great lengths to ensure they get the praise they think they deserve. This can look like seeking attention, boasting, or even manipulating situations for the spotlight.

Lack of empathy

One of the most defining traits of narcissism is an inability to truly empathize with others. Narcissists often struggle to understand or care about how other people feel. They might brush off your emotions, or worse, act like they don’t matter at all. This can leave you feeling unheard or invalidated.

Sense of entitlement

Ever met someone who expects special treatment without doing anything to earn it? Narcissists often believe they deserve the best of everything—whether it’s success, admiration, or resources. They might get frustrated or angry if they don’t receive what they think is owed to them.

Sense of entitlement

Ever met someone who expects special treatment without doing anything to earn it? Narcissists often believe they deserve the best of everything—whether it’s success, admiration, or resources. They might get frustrated or angry if they don’t receive what they think is owed to them.

Exploitative behavior

This trait can be tricky because it’s often subtle. Narcissists can be very good at using others for their own gain, whether it's taking advantage of someone’s time, resources, or emotions. They may not always be overtly malicious about it, but there’s a clear pattern of self-serving behavior.

Preoccupation with power and success

Narcissists tend to be obsessed with their own power, status, and success. They might talk endlessly about their achievements, focus on appearances, or constantly compare themselves to others. They want to be seen as superior, and they often measure their worth based on their social standing or accomplishments.

Envious of others (or believes others are envious of them)

Narcissists can have a hard time celebrating others’ successes. Instead, they may feel jealous or resentful of others' achievements or happiness. On the flip side, they may believe that everyone else is jealous of them, feeding into their sense of superiority.

Arrogance and superiority complex

Narcissists often carry themselves with an air of arrogance. They may put others down, dismiss other people’s opinions, or make themselves out to be more important or intelligent. This superiority complex can make it difficult for them to connect with others on a genuine level.

Manipulative and controlling tendencies

Manipulation is a common tool for narcissists. Whether it's guilt-tripping, gaslighting, or making others feel responsible for their emotions, narcissists can be very skilled at controlling situations to get what they want. They may twist the truth to make you doubt yourself or question your reality.

Highly reactive to criticism

Narcissists usually can’t handle criticism—constructive or otherwise. Even the smallest criticism can feel like a personal attack to them, and they may respond with defensiveness, anger, or even rage. They don’t take well to feedback, and often they’ll deflect or shift the blame onto others.

Superficial and image-obsessed

Looking good and maintaining an idealized image is incredibly important to a narcissist. They might focus a lot on how they appear to others, whether it’s their physical appearance, possessions, or lifestyle. Deep emotional connections or authenticity often take a backseat to this need to appear flawless.

Unstable relationships

Due to their manipulative tendencies and lack of empathy, narcissists often have unstable relationships. They may go through cycles of idealizing someone, only to suddenly devalue them. This push-pull dynamic can leave you feeling confused and emotionally drained.

How to protect yourself from a narcissist

Recognizing narcissistic traits is a huge step toward protecting yourself. If you’re dealing with someone who exhibits these behaviors, here are a few tips for setting boundaries.

• Set clear boundaries

  Be firm about what behavior you will tolerate and what you won’t. Narcissists often test limits, so it’s important to stay consistent.

• Don't engage in their drama

  Narcissists love to stir up conflict or drama. Try to disengage emotionally when they try to provoke you.

• Seek support

  Surround yourself with people who understand your experience. Therapy or talking to a trusted friend can also help you navigate the emotional complexities of a relationship with a narcissist.

• Take care of yourself

  It’s easy to get caught up in a narcissist’s world, but make sure you’re prioritizing your well-being. Engage in activities that bring you peace and joy, and practice self-care regularly.

Understanding the traits of a narcissist can help you gain clarity so you can protect yourself and manage your relationships in a healthier way. By recognizing these behaviors, you can take steps to set boundaries and prioritize your own mental and emotional health.

Written by Cara Hernon BSc Medical Science

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